By Shelia Watson

Much ado has been made lately about the Confederate battle flag and the boycott and how all of that will affect the tourist industry. And with our dependence on the tourist dollar, it's a serious concern – although the real issue for me is whether the economy is going to drive up the cost of my morning scone from Baker's Café.

Besides, the Cooper River Bridge Run is coming up and it just won't be the same if the boycott keeps away those several thousand lunatics who feel the need to trek across the swaying structure. (Me, I love being crushed into a crowd and getting vertigo as much as the next person, but I'm boycotting fitness runs until my doctor agrees to let me have chocolate again.)

As an avid reader of headlines (my eyes glaze over when I try to read through yet another flag story), I feel as qualified as anyone to address the issue. Here, then, is my commentary on whether tourism will be affected by the flag boycott:

No. And here's why:

Lessons learned from the history books

Charleston is quite resilient, having survived war, reconstruction, earthquakes, depression, hurricanes (with a recent evacuation fiasco), and the Charleston County School District (current slogan: "Brother, can you spare $13 million?"). The flag boycott is simply the latest tourist challenge in the timeline of challenges we've faced:

n In 1670, a group of English settler-tourists sailed up the Ashley River with the help of a group of Native Americans known as the Kiawah (a word that translates as "rich people will build summer homes here"). They landed at Charles Towne Landing but still had to pay full price because they left their park pass in the other boat.

n In 1786, the country's first golf course was established here. Impressive, except they had to wait another two centuries for landscape companies and power mowers to bring the grass below armpit level.

n In 1860, a group of boat owners fired a few shots toward Ft. Sumter to get the soldiers out so they could start the Ft. Sumter Tour Company. In relatiation, the soldiers fired back, starting what is commonly known as the War of Northern Aggression. The Confederate commander told his troops to keep the battle flag in good shape so it could fly over the state capital in a hundred years.

n In 2000, Charleston's mayor attempted to boost the city's image by walking to Columbia – taking a week to do what would take two hours by car. Residents who had sat in the I-26 parking lot during Hurricane Floyd realized the mayor was teaching a better method of hurricane evacuation.

Selling our culture

One of our best assets is our entertainment industry. What tourist would willingly pass up a chance to be entertained by the Charleston Symphony Orchestra, the Spoleto Festival, the MOJA Festival, or Sen. John Graham Altman?

Charleston has a long-standing tradition of nurturing the arts. In 1707, Henrietta Johnson, the first recognized woman artist, began painting portraits. Her first subject was Strom Thurmond. Other artwork for which we're renowned include a misnamed row of pastel houses, none of which portray any color found on any rainbow, replicated on everything from kitchen towels to coffee mugs.

Delivering ambiance

Despite our best efforts to maintain a flourishing tourist industry here, there may still be some who cannot get to Charleston. Now, thanks to modern technology, we can deliver Charleston and keep the tourist dollars rolling in by offering virtual vacations.

For a nominal fee, we can provide a scratch-and-sniff video of a diapered horse with a voice-over of a tour guide's spiel punctuated by clip-clops and honking horns. The virtual vacationer can drive around his neighborhood for an hour, simulating the parking experience downtown. Let the air out in two tires and ride the rim for an ersatz drive down cobblestone-laden Chalmers Street. Turn on the hot water in the shower full blast and – voila! – Charleston in August.

The bottom line is the prevailing alarm over the boycott is completely unfounded. If we can get a throng of people to come here and pay good money to run across a bridge no one considers safe enough to drive across – face it, people, we have nothing to worry about.